Things have been hard lately... Not much has happened so I am unsure as to why I let things bother me.
Well mom is dating this guy she met on a Facebook game. She talks to him many times throught the day on the cellphone. iT was nice to know mom found love and to see her smiling again but it got old quick. She stopped trying to be my mom. She doesn't text me anymore, she doesn't really talk to me anymore, and she just seems invisible-even
though I can see her. Its starting to bother me that he -some guy she doesn't even know in person- is able to replace her daughter. Well I haven't talked to her about it because I haven't decided if I'm jealous -which I don't feel that I am- or if she really is ignoring me more now than before.
Mom is planning a trip out to go see him. He lives in NY and they are meating half way in CT. I felt scared when she first told me about it. I was now feeling like the parent and even had to have the "how do you know he isn't gonna kill you" talk. She is acting like a kid. She is driving down there to meat a stranger. I decided fine if she is gonna see him she needs a shaporone or someone who can think clearly about the situation. But now thinking about it she should go alone and deal with what happens. she is almost 50 and can think for herself. But I'm more scared about this than she is. If I stay home and mom takes the car then dad will know where she went... And I don't want to be the one to tell him. I might go and I might not, either way I'm not staying home when she is gone.
So holidays in my home have not really been enjoyable but I make it through it. Mom stated yesterday that she was invited to south Carolina for Christmas. My heart just sank when she said that... Its the last Christmas for the house we live in and the last Christmas for Devin to be living with us-and she wants to miss it all for some guy. I asked her if she answered him and she didn't really say that she had or had not, but her face made it look like she was asking my for my approvals. If she wants to go she can. I'm the one stuck with stupid memories that will never play out as they did in the past.
So this leaves me sad and feeling very left out and abandoned. I have a wonderful love in my life she is always there but sometimes its not enough. I need someone to talk to who can't tell anyone what i said and at this point i don't even care if they like me... They can pretend.
So I don't remember if I rote about the lNA class I started... I'm almost done. Its so much fun and more rewarding than babies. Also I got my mid term evaluation back.. All but one check was in the excellent
Well mom is dating this guy she met on a Facebook game. She talks to him many times throught the day on the cellphone. iT was nice to know mom found love and to see her smiling again but it got old quick. She stopped trying to be my mom. She doesn't text me anymore, she doesn't really talk to me anymore, and she just seems invisible-even
though I can see her. Its starting to bother me that he -some guy she doesn't even know in person- is able to replace her daughter. Well I haven't talked to her about it because I haven't decided if I'm jealous -which I don't feel that I am- or if she really is ignoring me more now than before.
Mom is planning a trip out to go see him. He lives in NY and they are meating half way in CT. I felt scared when she first told me about it. I was now feeling like the parent and even had to have the "how do you know he isn't gonna kill you" talk. She is acting like a kid. She is driving down there to meat a stranger. I decided fine if she is gonna see him she needs a shaporone or someone who can think clearly about the situation. But now thinking about it she should go alone and deal with what happens. she is almost 50 and can think for herself. But I'm more scared about this than she is. If I stay home and mom takes the car then dad will know where she went... And I don't want to be the one to tell him. I might go and I might not, either way I'm not staying home when she is gone.
So holidays in my home have not really been enjoyable but I make it through it. Mom stated yesterday that she was invited to south Carolina for Christmas. My heart just sank when she said that... Its the last Christmas for the house we live in and the last Christmas for Devin to be living with us-and she wants to miss it all for some guy. I asked her if she answered him and she didn't really say that she had or had not, but her face made it look like she was asking my for my approvals. If she wants to go she can. I'm the one stuck with stupid memories that will never play out as they did in the past.
So this leaves me sad and feeling very left out and abandoned. I have a wonderful love in my life she is always there but sometimes its not enough. I need someone to talk to who can't tell anyone what i said and at this point i don't even care if they like me... They can pretend.
So I don't remember if I rote about the lNA class I started... I'm almost done. Its so much fun and more rewarding than babies. Also I got my mid term evaluation back.. All but one check was in the excellent
